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So I've never had my heart broken before and I never wanted to. With any of the relationships I have ever been in I always made sure that I basically never let my guard down more than I knew I was able to. I always grew tired of the person I was with or realized that they weren't a good match for me. I was always the heart-breaker and I liked it that way. I wasn't hurt.
With Chris I must say it was very different. We met on myspace, which some people would say our relationship was doomed anyway, but he was different. I had more in common with him than anyone I'd ever met. We both liked bands that were uncommon. Namely a ska band named Codename: Rocky. I love that band and had once thought to myself that if I ever met anyone who liked them as well then I would marry that person. As I browsed through random profiles I noticed his picture and his page seemed to illustrate someone I always wanted. He even mentioned something about loving Codename: Rocky!! The relationship progressed quickly, the first time we talked on the phone, we talked for at least two hours, the next night I went to meet him in person. After seeing Chicken Little and enjoying some Red Robin on our first date, we became a couple.
Everything seemed to fly by. I fell very hard and fast and it seemed he did too. We said I love you pretty soon into the relationship and talked constantly about our future house and plans. However, Chris and I are two very different people and although we had a lot in common, we also had a lot that we didn't agree upon. We always seemed to work through our problems and differences and come out stronger.
The day before Chris broke up with me we had actually discussed running away together that day and getting married. This subject came up a lot actually. We had even started buying things, little things like kithen ware and washcloths for our home. We had picked out red, black and white for our colors so everything we bought matched that.
The day we broke up started with a stupid argument and progressed to all the things that Chris disliked about me. I never knew that he harbored such animosity for me. Anyway, it's been a little over a month now and I still cry almost every day. I try to focus on the bad in our relationship, which there was a fair amount of, but I always end up thinking about how much I miss him. After getting my feelings hurt repeatedly during a few conversations between us I asked him not to contact me anymore because I had to try and get over him. I don't know if I made the right decision. Of course there is a lot more to the story, but I can't keep writing. I feel like I rambled on long enough. Kudos to anyone who has the patience to read this.

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