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He is the only person I want to be with…but he’s in a place now where I don’t know if I can reach him. I am breaking apart inside. I can’t feel anything but the pain in my chest bringing down to a level that I don’t ever want to be on. I feel like I’m dying inside, that every once of me is on fire burning until I find something to throw on the flames. We fight too much because we don’t know how to communicate with each other. I want to work on it I want to be with him…Not more than three days ago he told me that he wanted me to be his wife and now he won’t even touch me. Last night he told me that he couldn’t feel that he felt hollow and empty, but that he still loved me…Confusing, right? I try to be supportive but he just pushes me away. He says things to hurt me…Telling me that I ruin his day, that I don’t act like I love him…I would do anything for this man. I surprise him with his favorite candy, a movie that he’s been wanting, picking up his favorite food for dinner, doing his laundry…the list goes on. He does do things for me like cutting the grass and washing the dishes and I appreciate everything he does, but he doesn’t think that I do no matter what I say. I caught him looking at singles ads on Valentines Day, talk about a huge slap in the face…that should’ve been a red flag right? No not for me it was too hard to walk away. And now I’m in this situation and don’t have a clue of what to do. I feel like I’m living in limbo not knowing where tomorrow’s going to lead not knowing if his belongings will be there when I get home. For that past two days he has been so distant he just looks at me with a blank stare and all I want is to wrap my arms around him and kiss him…but I don’t because I think the rejection would kill me. I slept in a cold bed last night and waking up to this empty bed made me want to just run away. He was in the next room but I felt completely alone as I do as I write this. I have never loved anyone the way I love him. I would do anything to make him happy I just want to make him happy no matter what that entails…Everyone thinks I’m crazy…yeah crazy in love with someone who I thought was crazy about me. I need some advice or someone just to talk to…

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