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He was unlike any other man or so I thought - I fell so truly, madly, deeply for this man my heart still aches. The first time I met him we laughed and talked for hours - when he said goodbye my heart ached and my only explanation for this feeling was love!!! I couldnt wait to see him, talk with him, laugh with him again - I wanted to kiss him so bad and he is so handsome (he had me completely in awe) I never thought I could feel like I was falling in love again for the first time - but he did it for me! We spent so much time talking, laughing, loving, getting to know each other (almost 2 years). The kicker - we lived in different cities and since he travelled to see me I never had to go to his city. His excuse for not moving was that his father was very ill and he would live forever in guilt if his dad died and he was not there - so I understood that and wanted him to spend as much time with him as possible. When his father died - I consoled him, supported him - my heart broke for this man that I loved. Two months have passed since his dad passed away and I searched his obituary - when I found it I was in shock - the man I was in love with has a wife and four children - I was shaking inside - I couldn't beleive what I was reading. I asked him if this was true and he admitted it was, in all the times that we talked and spent together never once did that come up in a conversation. I broke it off immeidately - I still love him, I want to be with him but let him go becuase he already has a life - the life that I wanted to build with him and I am so hurt but I am not angry - am I crazy??? I just feel lost and I don't know what to do. I am still in love with him - trying to heal my first broken heart....again :(

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