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30 years
thrown away
I know now how much a tragic filled childhood can efect someone forever.
I can look back now and see the warning signs
I mistakenly stored them in my head as normal changes that any long term realtionship would go through.
He was a great father and husband for so many years...
8 months of therapy barely began to scratch the surface for me to answere questions.
My X could not value the marriage enough to seriously work on saving it. I suspect that being the age he was he just got tired of pretending to be happy. It was a very good act he had learned early in life-a survival tecnique. Every one we knew and to this day most people think he is a happy-go-lucky guy. Depression can hide like a faint shadow but devour like a lion.
Without the Lord in my life now at the very least, I would be a very sad shell of a person if not dead. I had to decide to follow my God. This trial has brought me closer to my Him and I am walking in faith that He has much more for me even in this life. I am trusting and striviving to obey His word. This is where true contentment lies. So I walk on.

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