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He's my first ever boyfriend. He even was my high school crush so for me he was my dream come true. But as months pass I'm starting to realize that I'm getting myself inside a nightmare. He broke up with me. (For the first time out of all the gazillion times). Then I knew that I'm just his rebound girlfriend. Too bad I gave my EVERYTHING to him. But I still found myself being more inlove with him.I let myself be the other woman. I don't know why he liked me even if his girlfriend is almost perfect. Because of that I got more insecure ans felt bad about myself. To cut the long story short, I got tired of being a fool for him. Found a new guy. Free from him for 8 months. Then we saw each other again. He was different. He pursued me. He's more eager to get back with me and I felt how inlove he is with me. He told me he realized a lot about me, that he loves me more than ill ever know. I felt like the luckiest person on earth because finally I'm no longer the rebound. I'm no longer the other woman. But sad to say, my insecurities, my trauma from the past crept in our almost perfect relationship. I think its mainly my fault of letting those crap ruin us. I finally decided to let go him. I can't let him be with me. I want the best for him. And its not me. But I'm so broken. Because I love him. More than I love myself.

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