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I met her six months before anything happened between us. We where just friends who slowly grew closer over time. At fist we spoke just once or twice a week, But after a month we ended up speaking everyday to a point where we only craved eachothers company. I knew i was falling for her and didn't know what to do this was my first love. After weeks of going oer it in my head i finally worked p the guts to tell her but before the day was over I had gotten kicked out of school. (I was only 17) I ended up mving out of california and in to Utah to finish my education. I thought that was the end of what I felt but instead the two of us ended up begint text buddy's. We where just that for a few months more until one December nite. By then i couldn't go a day without speaking to her know one ever made me feel so happy even though I had not seen her in months. But I didn't know how to explain what i felt to her and the guts i worked up where all gone by then. I felt like a cowered for what i planed to do. That night i told her we where not to speak anymore. This was not my first atempt to end are friendship for fear of growing to close. But that night while I was in my sisters house I snuck in to the restroom in the middle of the night so I wouldn't wake anyone. There in a bathroom i cried as i told her it was over but instead of letting what we had even though just a friendship go she asked me why, why is it over what happened. I was not to lie to her I told her the truth that i loed her even though i was sure she would reply "oh okay good bye" I was stupid She replied "I love you to please don't go" That was the first time in the world I was truly happy I never felt such happyness in my entire life before that, If i knew what would happen latter on down the road I might have gone through with my plan. After that night we grew much closer even though so far away frome one another. Every morninng and every night she was the first and last i would speak to. Sometimes she would text me good morning seconds before i would almost as if we where in the same room and she woul interupt me. Everyday I only loved her more my little long haired mexican beauty nothing made me more happy then that girl, I knew what it was, was true love and i only wish to have it once again. The next december came along I was to go back to california in less then a month. I told her and she was almost crying from happyness of us finally being together. That night we stood up all night talking to one another I even praposed to her... I still remamber what she said how it went. ME, "I feel like i can spend the rest of my life with you" HER "what you want to marry me" ME "Maybe, what would you say if i asked?" "YES!" "Really! well Alexantria will you marry me!?!?" "Wait not yet I want you to ask me when your here i want it to remamber it!"
I felt as if i would never be sad again, as if no matter what happened everything was going to be alright I never stopped smiling ever. Finally after a year i was to return to california to be with my love. I called her my ring of fire do to the johnny cash song we both liked. But when i returned I found out she had just moved away from my hometown to a place called redlands. It was an hour away and I planned on visiting her as soon as i could. But thats when things started to change. Slowly as she said it the fire was set to low. She seemed to never have time for me anymore I would never get an answer when ever i called o text her. I felt as if it was my fault as if i had done this to make her fall out of loe with me. It continued like that for weeks until one day she finally told me she no longer loved me. I was sitting up against my brothers pitbulls house under a dark sky crying my eyes out fo hours. I spent the night under a dark sky feeling less then human as if i was one with dogs and to this day i still feel the same as i did that night. That was the first time but unforchinetly not the last. Out of all that pain i felt as if i had to leave to go somewhere far away. So i decided to join the military. Before i was to tell the world I told her In my mothers bathroom this time, I had no privacy. I expect her to say okay im sorry or something of the sort but instead I got an "I love you!" I wasn't sure what to say or think but like a fool i excepted it, ut not without trying to proswade her otherwise. In the end she said"Fine I loe a dead man" And to stat another foolish journy down heartbreaks dark road I excepted her back in to my life. Nothing had changed she still never had time for me but I blind did not see the obviuse. For weeks it was like that until I was excepted in to ITT TECH in san bernardino, The town next to her new home. A few more weeks I finally moved down there to be with my fauls love. I waitted a week to settle in Before telling her and like always i got a different reaction then what i thought i would. She didn't want to see me she broke up with me again and that time i grew wise. I spent the next cupple days in bed listenning to my favorit artist johnny cash I guess things happen that way. Its been a year since the last heartbreak but the pain feels as if it has only been momments All i can do is carry on or at least try I don't smile as much anymore i usually force a smile enfront of friends but cry alone with only my soul as company. I could never listen to the song ring of fire after that, And to think I never even got to hold her hand...I Don't Like It But I Guess Things Happen That Way :*/

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