honey,you are not too young to have a broken heart. I am twice your age (31) and you summed up my feelings perfectly. I was with Mike for 3 years. I gave him everything I had. I waited patiently while he did 2 (6) month stints working overseas. I took care of all his affairs while he was gone and was here for him when he came back. I had suspicions while he was gone the last time because he didnt call as often as the first time he went away. When he came back everything was fantastic. We talked about buying a house together (we were living in my apartment). He emptied out his suitcases and there was stuff all over the place for a while. After about a month I got sick of the clutter and starting sorting through it. A letter fell from a book and I made the mistake of reading it. It was from a woman on the cruise ship that he worked on telling him how much she loves him and how sad she was that he broke up with her. WHAT? How can MY boyfriend break up with HER? I confronted him and he said she was this crazy chick that he was nice too and then all of a sudden she thought he was dating her. He said she took it bad when he told her she was mistaken. I wanted to believe him but I had my doubts so I did the worst thing possible...I hacked into his e-mail looking for evidence. Of course I could not live with this either. Eventually I told him what I did because I couldnt be dishonest with him in that way and he couldnt forgive me. He said the trust issue was too much and 3 days ago he said we were done. He says he still loves me but that love isnt enough with all of the trust issues we now have. I cant trust him not to cheat and he cant trust me not to snoop. A friend is coming tonight to help him move his stuff out. The best I could get from him is that we can try starting back at sqare 1 (after 3 years!) and see how that goes but with the way he looks at me and acts towards me now I dont think he will take me back. I think lets see how it goes is just his way of not wanting to hurt me more by saying we are definitely through. Which means I will have all this false hope that maybe everything will be ok and a month from now when he doesnt put any effort into calling me or seeing me I will be heartbroken all over again because he will finally say see, we gave it another shot and its not working out I love him like nothing else. The pain of having someone in your life for 3 years to just walk away from you is too much. The thought of him not wanting to even try to work it out and just bailing...I cant even describe how hopeless I feel. The thought of him turning his back on me and finding someone else after all we had together...SIGH. All I can do is sigh because Im sick of crying. I want nothing more than to just be with him and its made worse thats its my fault for being snoopy. So many regrets
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